Holding Space

Holding Space is just that: holding a space for someone that needs to be held or needs to be heard.  We don't try to fix the person, we don't try to give advice.  We simply are there, judgement free, giving that person time to share with us.

One of the biggest lessons I've learned these last few years is that allowing someone to process their feelings and giving them the chance to tell you about it, is all that they need at times.  The answer usually lies inside of them, and sharing releases the flow of thoughts, just like a tap.   I don't need to make their experience about me; I don't need to recommend a solution, or make it about me and tell them my story.  

Now, when you are holding space in a circle, MAGIC always happens.  Everyone shares, Everyone listens, and answers come to us all.  We sit in a state of BEING, of being present, of being a loving connection, without having to DO anything. We are not taking responsibility for each other, we are simply holding each other.  

I have seen such vulnerability and I have done the most growing by just being present with the woman sharing.   Holding Space is the biggest lesson in restraint.  

What will it look like when you hold space for someone?  You allow them to feel all the emotions that are okay to feel as a human.  

How can you prepare to hold space?   Here are some things you can do today to prepare yourself. You can start by  learning mindfulness.  By learning to separate yourself from your own EGO.  Can you listen to any story without being judgemental of the person telling it? Have you been able to learn the art of unconditional love: A love that exists no matter what?  You must learn to accept the person's thoughts and words without judgement .

Start today by holding space for yourself.   Can you write down or record yourself saying what you are thinking and feeling without judging yourself?   Find time to sit and provide yourself a sacred space for healing and process.  LOVE YOURSELF today unconditionally, and learn to talk to yourself without the judgment and the predisposed voices in your head.